Things You Need In The Kitchen

As a financial advisor, I often hear people lament that they spend more and more on food. I see that many people eat out far too often because they don't have the time to shop and cook. And when I visit people's homes, I see that pantries, refrigerators and freezers are filled with prepackaged, pre-prepared meals. It's makes my mouth cry.

I want to help. I've made a list of everything I use regularly and provide a bit of extra advice. Generic or store brand is fine for almost everything. I'm also including our costs as best I can (living in the Denver suburbs). I hope this helps. There are no excuses not to enjoy yourself, at least occasionally in the kitchen and save some money in the process.

Staples.
All Purpose Flour, Bread Flour, White Sugar, Brown Sugar, White Rice (California Short grain "Sushi-style"), Honey, Kidney Beans, Black Beans, Bacon, reserved Bacon Grease, Peanut Butter, Canned Whole Tomatoes, White Vinegar, Cider Vinegar, Olive Oil, Soy Sauce, Worcestershire Sauce, Brown Mustard, Yellow Mustard, Ketchup (or Catsup), Dry Vermouth, Yellow Corn Meal, Cheddar Cheese, Large Eggs (preferably farm fresh), Kosher Salt, Table Salt, Black Pepper Corns, Whole Bean Coffee, Skim Milk, Unsalted Butter, Heavy Cream, Canola (or Vegetable) Oil, Yeast, Vegetable Shortening, Lard, Red and Green Tabasco Sauce, Baking Powder, Baking Soda, Oatmeal (Quick Oats), Cooking Spray, Popcorn, Mushrooms, Broccoli, Carrots, Celery, Onions, Garlic, Orange Juice, Oranges, Lemons, Limes, Bananas, Potatoes, Roma Tomatoes, Hamburger (we use venison because I hunt and kill it and we process the meat ourselves), Boneless Skinless Chicken Breasts, Bacon, Pork Shoulder Roast, Spices (whole when possible, ground if you're using a ton of it or you have very small quantities), Herbs (fresh when possible, dried over the winter if you have to) Cost: $201.69 initially for shopping the way we do (and buying hamburger); $125/month to maintain it.

Tools.

8-inch Chef's Knife (Victorinox), Chef's Kitchen Cleaver (Joyce Chen), Serrated Knife, Paring Knife, Steel, Silicone Cutting Mats (Color-coded for various food preps), Wood Cutting Board (Don't spend money on this. Talk to a local high school shop teacher or student. You can get it for free and appreciate it more.) Mixing Bowls (I use glass, metal and plastic for various things), Stand Mixer (heavy duty), Blender, Food Processor, 2 10-inch Frying Pans (well seasoned), Wok (very well seasoned), Pressure Cooker, 12-quart Pot, 6-quart Pot, Wire Whisk, Wooden Spoon, Silicone Spatulas, Cast Iron Dutch Oven, Electric Skillet, Mortar and Pestle, Blowtorch, Kitchen Shears Cost about $1000, about 1/2 of that just for the stand mixer (but only $50 for all the knives, combined).

Extras.

This can be anything. Go to farmers' markets and look for whatever is in season. Go to local ethnic markets (my favorite is the Asian market down the street) and try things you've never seen before. For tools, my brother loves specialty tools that will only be used for a specific purpose. I go in the opposite direction--my meat tenderizer is a 2 lbs rubber mallet (the same one I use to seal lids onto paint cans.) I do have popover pans and a V-slicer mandolin that works like a dream. But this is your kitchen and you will have special interests you'll want to try and space limitations that will keep you from buying (or at least keeping) every little thing you see.

Don'ts.

Don't buy cheap but don't overpay, either. Know where you can buy non-organic (thick skin or peel that isn't eaten) and when it has to be higher quality. For hardware, ask yourself if it last for 10 years or more. Maybe then ask if you would want to have it for 10 years or more. Don't let your knives get dull (dangerous!); don't leave hot oil unattended (more dangerous!); don't cut raw meat and raw veggies on the same mat or with the same knife (that's just inviting trouble.)

Taking the time and spending a little bit of money, over time, gets you to the point of having a kitchen you enjoy. An ancient Chinese proverb says, "The journey of 10,000 miles begins with a single step." Go ahead and take that first step. Start something in the kitchen.

Tonight for Dessert
Bourbon Pears
1 Bartlet Pear per person
Bourbon (cheap is good here)
Sauce

Split pears in half, length-wise and core and peel, leaving stem intact, if possible. Stack them into a mason jar as tightly as possible without crushing them (you want to keep them in their best shape). Fill the jar with bourbon. Let stand for the day; two would be better.

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees. Remove the pears from the jar, reserving the bourbon for a nice pear-infused cocktail. (Use your own recipe or look back at the Manhattan a couple of months ago.) Bake the pears for 20 minutes in a glass baking dish.

Place the pears onto their respective serving dishes and drizzle with your favorite sauce--chocolate, caramel, a honey & wine reduction, or serve with a dollop of whipped cream cheese. MMMM!

The Perks of Being a Foodie

I was recently invited to judge a chili cookoff.  An informal affair, but filled with good humor, good friends and of course, good food.  I understand the honor of being chosen to judge rather than to cook.  It implies that I have a decerning palate, I can recognize the various degrees of good, I can justify my reasoning when someone calls my judgement into question and I can be charming and gracious to winner and loser alike.  I understand that I am also the pinnacle of integrity.  At least that's what it means in my mind. 

It does require putting personal friendships and emotions aside for a little while.  When you've clearly picked a chili that is not your friend's, it helps to have a thick skin, lots of charm and a few quick-witted jokes. 

Friend: It's over between us.

Me: Really?  But I was just getting to know you.

Friend: Well, that's come to a screeching halt, hasn't it?  You didn't pick my chili.

Me: My subconscience took pity on a lesser participant.  I wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong ideas. 
Friend: What wrong ideas?  It was a great chili.
Me: Oh, people would talk.  Rumors would get started.  "What did she have to do to win that award?"
Friend: I didn't have to do anything!  It was great chili!

Me: Yes, and now everyone will be suggesting impious things about your competitor.  I have successfully preserved your spotless name.  You may show your gratitude by serving me another bowl of your delicious chili.

I now offer a few suggestions for anyone planning to enter the judging lifestyle: 

1) As any self-respecting judge knows, bribes should be descrete.  Don't flaunt any "appreciation" that may have been shown for a job well done or an "impartial" opinion reached.  If no bribes are offered, still do a good job.  Don't take petty vendettas against those who don't know any better.  But find a gentle way of coaching so that these mistakes may be avoided in the future.

2) Never let anyone see your notes while you're in the throes of critique.  There is nothing more embarrasing than your true feelings being revealed.  How would you feel if one of the judged found out that you think their chili "lacks body," "has an interesting aroma," or "is reminiscent of the flavor in my mouth the last time I woke up after a three-day bender."  Simply because you think something, it does not mean that it should be completely expressed.  Similarly, if your notes need to be reviewed and therefore seen by the masses, know this ahead of time and have your own internal code.  For me, for example: "sweet" = "canned sauce;" "beans appear overcooked" = "looks like catfood;" or "terrible" = "O! For the love of all that is holy!  My tastebuds are abandoning my mouth!  I have tasted evil!  Why has God forsaken me?  Kill me now!"

3) Never let them see you sweat.  You may taste spicy foods, you may taste disagreeable foods, you may even be pranked, but keep your chin up.  If something is so "terrible" (see above) as to shame the very idea of food, remember, this is theater and all eyes are on you.  Retain the drama.  Your public awaits your verdict and there is no satisfaction for them in knowing the descision before the award ceremony. 

Indeed, judging offers tremendous rewards and prestige in the community.  When handled correctly, it can also be quite lucrative.  But I'd rather be cooking.  And in case anyone out there is looking to enter my cooking into a contest, I offer great bribes.

Tonight for dinner:

Butterfly Rosemary Lemon Game Hens

1 Game Hen per person

3 Lemon slices per hen

fresh Rosemary

Salt and Pepper

Heat the oven to 400 degrees.

Remove the hens from their packages and rinse them thoroughly inside and out.  Using kitchen sheers (or the proper use of a good knife) cut the back out of the birds by cutting along the spine on both sides from tail to neck.  Using a paring knife, remove the wishbone.  Open the birds and flatten them out skin-side up.  Gently run your fingers between the skin and the meat, seperating the two.  Place one slice of lemon under the skin on each side of the breast and 1/2 a slice under the skin on the thighs.  Place sprigs of rosemary liberally under the skin wherever you can.  Sprinkle inside and out with salt and pepper.

Place the birds bones down and skin up on a cookie sheet, tuck the wings under themselves and slide it all into the oven.  Cook for 30 minutes and then take their temperature using an instant read thermometer, checking the breast meat and thighs.  Thighs should be 175 degrees and breast about 165.  If not, cook for a few minutes more.  When done, remove from the oven and cover with foil, letting it rest for 10 minutes. 

Enjoy!

Dinning at The Fort

We recently celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary. In a brilliant moment of foresight, we planned our wedding so that our anniversaries might correspond to Denver's 5280 Restaurant Week. Never mind that we got married 9 years before the promotion started, and that it was the first date the church was available --this is our week.

For those who live outside of Colorado (or perhaps under a Colorado rock) 5280 (pronounced "Fifty-two Eighty") Restaurant Week follows the restaurant promotions of other cities but we are one mile above sea level: 5,280 feet = one mile, representative of the Mile High City. Get it? Here the restaurants feature multi-course dinners for the low, low price of $52.80 per couple (or $26.40 for a single person or a third wheel) and according to VISIT DENVER, the Convention and Visitors Bureau 281 restaurants participated this year.

We chose The Fort for our dining experience. Known for it's gourmet treatment of game meats (Venison, Bison, Quail, et al), and its tagline "Food and Drink from the Early West." I can't confirm that my cocktail was from the early West, but it was damn good. "Traders Whiskey." Fine bourbon, red chilies, tobacco and black gunpowder. Served neat, in a cordial glass. (OK, we did look it up. Find more, here.)

For the 5280 promotion, The Fort served a prix fixe menu of house salad, choice of Bison Ribs or Bison Brochette, with a quail and sides of corn with Lima beans, and mashed potatoes. Peach cobbler for dessert. They also gave us sourdough rolls and pumpkin muffins (with little apple pieces baked inside--delightful!) We ordered nothing more, and we were stuffed to the gills. Generous portions and delicious food! Because it was our anniversary, we also had our picture taken in authentic headgear (actually, I think mine was a hardhat with some buffalo fur scraps from the souvenir counter taped to it.) And although we didn't eat it that night, they gave us an additional desert of Chocolate Chili Bourbon Cake.

The picture probably would have been better served before the gluttony, but c'est la vie.
I sincerely recommend scheduling some time next year to take advantage of 5280 Restaurant Week. With nearly 300 restaurants participating in every neighborhood and small town in the Denver Metro area, everyone can find something to suit their tastes, and this is a great way of trying something new. The dates are not announced very far in advance but for scheduling purposes, please consider that no restaurant wants to lose its Valentine's Day revenue, nor try to work around the St. Patty's day hullabaloo. I don't know what the dates will be next year, but I know when they WON'T be.
For breakfast this morning:
Brule Bananas, Oven Bacon, Eggs over Easy and freshly baked Bread
Brulee Bananas

Slice bananas lengthwise and rest on a wire rack, on a cookie sheet, over a non-flammable surface. Sprinkle very liberally with white sugar. Don't substitute here! Nothing else will burn in quite the same way.

Grab your best blow torch. (Side note: do NOT spend the extra money on a "brulee torch." They are too small, are over-priced, and you have to spend extra for fuel refills. Instead, go for the small propane bottles, and a $6 screw-on torch.) Patiently melt the sugar, holding the torch relatively still until the sugar begins to burn, turns deeply golden brown and bubbly. You can refrigerate for a few minutes, but do not cover or the crispy shell will liquefy.

Bread

2 cups Bread Flour (more gluten than All Purpose Flour)

2 tablespoons Yeast

1 1/2 cups warm (110 degrees F) Water

2 more cups Bread Flour + more for kneading

1/2 teaspoon Salt

1/2 stick of unsalted Butter, melted

The night before, combine 2 cups flour and yeast in a large bowl and stir to combine. Add the water stir until everything is well mixed. Cover with plastic wrap and let it do it's thing. In the morning it will have tripled or quadrupled in size.

Add 2 more cups of flour, salt and butter and mix until it comes together in a shaggy mass. Turn out onto a floured kneading surface and knead for about 5 minutes or until it's smooth. Return to the bowl, cover with a warm damp cloth and let rise for 1 hour. Punch it down and let rise in the same way for another 45 minutes.

Shape the loaf on a piece of parchment paper let rise while the oven preheats. Bake at 400 degrees for 25 - 30 minutes. Let cool on a cooling rack for 10 minutes (or a little more). Slice and eat it while it's warm.

FAQs

1) Why are you blogging?

What can I say--I'm a giver. Sometimes things like this have to happen. Does it make me a hero? Perhaps. A humanitarian? Almost certainly. A Pulitzer prize-winning author? Hardly.

I've often been critiqued by friends and family that I never write down any of my recipes. And I don't follow a cookbook. (Although I have many--read on.) And when I make something that I want to repeat, I regularly can't remember what I've done. This is my attempt to remedy all of that. And entertain myself in doing so.


2) How'd you get started cooking?

My mom and dad. Known for the quality and quantity of her food preparation, my mom can produce a salad, three sides, a loaf of bread, three pies for dessert and a coffee cake for the next morning's breakfast without thinking twice. And the problem is, I WANT TO EAT IT ALL! It's delicious! My Dad, on the other hand, owns the grill. Try him out: bring him fish or fowl, beef or game, pork, lamb or mystery meat, and I promise you, your taste buds will dance in exaltation. There has always been a certain destiny for me and my brothers and our passion for food.


3) Where do you get your inspiration?

First and foremost, from the love of tasting. I love putting good things in my mouth. Let your sense of taste learn to identify various flavors. When you bite into a ripe pear, what happens? Where in your mouth do you taste it? Now dust it with a sprinkle of cinnamon. How does it change? Add a few grains of salt. A whole new world has just opened up with three simple ingredients--when you really take the time to experience it.

I also read a lot of cookbooks. Fannie Farmer. The Joy of Cooking. The Essentials of Italian Cuisine. Cooks Illustrated. The foundation of many good ideas start in a cookbook, but I just change and substitute as necessary. And television. Iron Chef, hands down, does more to stimulate the old brain-pan to think outside of convention.


4) Have you ever made anything that wasn't good?

Yes. The most egregious act of treason ever committed in a kitchen was Sesame Fried Tofu.

My wife and I had a fight, and we have a covenant that we will not go to bed or leave each other in anger. This also means that sometimes we'll fight for hours before we get things resolved. (For any men reading this, learn this simple phrase: "You are absolutely right honey. I could not be more sorry." It's a good start, and when you mean it, will cut hours off of the heat of battle.) So, after all the vitriol had been expelled from our bodies, it may have still hung in the air. The attempt at diner that night was tainted. We sat and ate it anyway, but after about 5 minutes, I looked over to her and said, "This is really horrible, isn't it?" And I smiled. She said, "yes but I didn't want to say anything." And she smiled, too.


5) What does "Beyond Viand" mean?

A viand is a delicate and delectable dish. I am beyond that. More like guerrilla warfare in the kitchen.


6) What's for dinner tonight?

Picadillo Oaxaqueno
adapted from Rick Bayless' book Authentic Mexican: Regional Cooking from the Heart of Mexico

1 pound Venison (Round Steak) (You can use pork, chicken, beef. You could probably use some kind of fiberous vegetable matter, too, but I'm not a vegetarian.)
1 Onion, chopped
1 clove Garlic, minced
1 tablespoon Olive Oil
2 tablespoons Red Chili Powder (Chimayo)
1 inch Cinnamon Stick, grated
6 Cloves, ground
12 Black Pepper Corns, ground
2 cans (16 oz) Crushed Tomatoes
1/3 cup Raisins
1/3 cup lightly crushed and toasted Walnuts

Slow braise the venison until it's pull-apart tender (think pot roast). This should take a few hours. Shred it.

In a large frying pan, heat the olive oil to saute hot. Add the garlic and onion and cook until translucent. Add the shredded meat, chili, cinnamon, cloves and pepper. Mix well. Add the tomatoes and raisins.

Simmer, stirring every 15 minutes for about 45 minutes or until the sauce has thickened to the consistency you like. I like sloppy joe consistency. Add the walnuts.

Serve with fried plantains, fried polenta, soft or fried tortillas or sopapillas.

Surprises Can Be Good

As a financial advisor, I visit networking groups now and then. On occaision, to illustrate the difference between me and advisors who are not me, I provide this analogy:

"You can't swing a dead cat without hitting a financial advisor in this town. But like a great cook, a great advisor is a rare and precious find. So what separates a good cook from a great cook? The ingredients available to one are there for the other. I think it's patience and creativity. A great cook knows that some ingredients need to be added at different times to develop the flavors. It can't be rushed. And finding new ways of combining the same old ingredients may yield plesantly shocking surprises."

And I am a great cook.

That's a fun (and dare I say accurate!) analogy, but it reminds me of the problem with many restaurants. Specifically, this is why I don't eat at any of the large chain restaurants. It's not that these places are bad. Many have found great ways of giving back to the communities in which they are a part. It's not that the food is bad. Each chain I'm picking on today uses high quality ingredients and increasingly often, fresh rather than frozen or canned. No, the reason for my distain begins with the corporate training for their cooks. (Yes. I said "cooks" not "chefs.") The masses who frequent these chain restaurants have lauded the two elements which are the enemy to any artist: low cost and consistency. (Think Rembrandt vs Bob Ross.)




The food prepared at one point of sale in a chain is expected to be identical to any other point in that chain. An order of eggs over easy, a slice of ham, hashbrowns and 2 pancakes will not only have the same flavor from store to store, but will even be arranged on the plate to look identical. And to keep the prices as consistent and competitive as possible, they order the same ingredients for every location knowing exactly how much of each ingredient goes into each serving. Henry Ford's principles applied to the kitchen.

It's easy to get up on my soapbox. We demand that there be no accidents that could spoil an otherwise consistent dinner. We are willing to sacrifice surprise. But let me phrase this another way: "It's easy for ME to get up on MY soapbox." I don't have kids. No growing teenagers who need an All-You-Can-Eat Buffet. When one has the luxury of time, then one has the ability to hunt for locally owned establishments. I get to know the waitstaff and chef. I can stay late and talk during the off-peak hours. I try to tip well and say thank you and tell the manager how much we enjoyed ourselves. I don't mind paying $10 more for a tab at a Mom-and-Pop restaurant if it's high quality and they are working to offer something unique.

Instead of The Olive Garden, I go to Stellas. Instead of Applebees, I go to the OLI.

Go to the chains if you have to, but I encourage you, when you have the time, take it. Follow the road less traveled. Make friends with people who take care of you. Search out people and restaurants who have a a passion for food. In short, reward yourself with a few of the finer things in life. You deserve it.

For some pleasantly shocking surprises try:

Homemade Pizza

for the Dough:
4 1/2 cups All Purpose Flour + more for kneading
1/2 teaspoon Salt
1 1/2 tablespoons dry Yeast
2 tablespoons Agave Nectar (or honey)
2 tablespoons Olive Oil
1 cup of warm Water (+ more if needed)

In a stand mixer (preferably) or a mixing bowl, combine all the dry ingredients. Stir to combine. In another bowl combine the nectar, oil and water. At a low mixing speed with a dough hook, add the wet into the dry ingredients. Continue to mix until the dough comes together in a rough shaggy mass. turn out onto a floured counter. and knead, adding flour as necessary until the dough is smooth.

Return to the bowl and cover with a warm damp towel. Let rise for 45 minutes. Punch down, turn and let rise for another 45 minutes.

Make your sauces:

Tomato
1 clove of Garlic sliced very thin (think of the scene in Goodfellas) or pressed
1 tablespoon Extra Virgin Olive Oil (yes, the good stuff--it matters here)
1 can Tomato Sauce
2 tablespoons Sugar
1 can Tomato Paste
1 tablespoon each of dried Basil, Oregano

Heat the oil in the pan on medium high heat. Add the garilc until it nearly dissolves. Reduce the heat and stir in the sauce, sugar and paste. Stir until smooth. Add the herbs. Add a pinch of salt if needed.

Preheat the oven to 45 degrees for a thin crust pizza or 425 for a thick crust. After the dough has risen a 2nd time, divide into 3 equal parts for thin crust or 2 parts for thick crust. I like rolling the dough out onto a piece of parchment paper. It makes transferring and clean-up MUCH easier. Prick it all over with a fork to keep it from getting bubbles. Coat with a thin layer of olive oil, then sauce. Add toppings. Bake it in the oven until the edges are golden brown and the cheese in the center is bubbly but not crusty (about 10 minutes thin crust, 15 min thick crust).

Some of the toppings to try:

Pepperoni
Ham
Ground Beef
Chicken
Anchovies
Sausages
Shrimp
Pork
Bacon

Mushrooms
Asparagus
Artichoke
Bell Pepper
Chili Peppers
Onions
Rosted Garlic
Pineapple
Mandarin Oranges
Apples
Tomato Slices

Spinach
Basil
Rosemary


Pesto
Alfredo
Sweet and Sour
Tomato
Olive Oil (with a little Balsamic Vinegar)



Anything else you want to try--it's yours to experiment




Banana Chicken Tacos


1 tablespoon Olive Oil
2 boneless skinless Chicken Breasts
Salt
2 tablespoons Chimayo Chili Powder
1/4 teaspoon Cardamom Powder
1/8 teaspoon Cumin Powder
1 Banana sliced
6-8 Corn or Flour Tortillas


Slice the chicken into 1/4 slices and saute in hot olive oil. When it starts getting brown on all sides, reduce the heat to medium or medium low. Add the spices and continue to stir until evenly coated. Add the banana. If the banana is ripe enough, it'll become a sticky sugary sauce.


Serve it up in the tortillas with grated cheese, chopped tomato, shredded lettuce, salsa, sour cream, etc.

Food and Illness

I have a cold. Or a sinus infection. Or probably more accurately, sinusitis. Lovingly, happily, zealously, friends have come to the rescue offering (or insisting on) home remedies for getting rid of whatever bug ails me.

Knowing that even a Nobel Prize winning scientist like Linus Pauling could get overwhelmed by enthusiastic attachment to misapplied theories, improper research, and incorrectly extrapolated conclusions, what can the average Joe (or Jane) on the street believe?

While growing up, my Grandfather prescribed Blackberry Brandy for nearly every internal disease my Mom or her siblings could face. (My Dad's Dad, by contrast would use Kerosene. "Cut off your finger? Let me dunk that stump into my cure-all jar of Kerosene." No, it wouldn't make the finger grow back but it would certainly re-focus the attention from whining about your finger. My wife's Grandfather carried the same zeal for enemas!)

Several people recommended echinacea. Not at all surprising is that the conclusions are inconclusive. Well, nearly inconclusive. Tests aimed at preventing a cold all came back negative. Echinacea will not prevent a cold, but it MAY reduce the effects and duration. It seems that researchers are having difficulty determining what part of the echinacea plant is effective, and how it should be produced. Note: according to the research I read, there is a 58% chance of showing reduced symptoms by 1-3 days versus those taking a placebo. Modest improvement, yes, but hardly a silver bullet.

Some of my dearest friends insisted on garlic, two of them vehemently. (If you're reading this, you're not one of the vehement ones.) I know of some of the research done on garlic for cardiovascular diseases and cancer. It has conclusively been shown to fight off bacteria, viruses and other little beasties in a test tube. (I imagine the Sharks and the Jets fighting on neutral turf, snapping their little molecular fingers, dancing their little microscopic dance.) Unfortunately, garlic as a prevention for a cold looks bleak. IF you take garlic everyday for 3 months before being exposed to the viruses most associated with a cold, you may have a slightly better chance of staying healthy. There is so far no evidence for garlic treating a cold once you have one. Garlic still rocks, and I cook with it often. But I'll rely more on its flavor than medicinal qualities.

I love Chicken Soup. No, it doesn't really cure a cold, but warm broth and a multitude of basic nutrients provide immediate comfort. Oh wait--research DOES show that chicken soup can help, at least in vitro. (The Jets and the Sharks have someone else to rumble with.) And usually someone else is making it for you, which means you're being pampered. While most naturopathic remedies feature a product that can be sold in capsules, drops or other refined form, anyone can make chicken soup and even in can form, the competition keeps the price low. Just make sure you have good chicken and lots of good veggies.

As to treating the symptoms, I recommend a Hot Toddy or the Virgin Hot Toddy: Lemon and Honey. Warm liquids and honey both soothe a scratchy throat, and lemon provides a modest mucus-clearing ability. To add bourbon or not is a matter of preference, although alcohol in moderation does promote a good night's sleep.

So what's the best? I recommend cuddling up with someone who will put up with you, eat some chicken soup, drink a hot toddy, and get lots of rest. As Leonard told Joel Fleischman in the "Heal Thy Self" episode of Northern Exposure: "The doctor's job is to make the patient feel more comfortable until the body can heal itself." There is some wisdom to that. If a hot toddy and chicken soup work like that for you, great. If it's a garlic enema with a vitamin C chaser, great. Just don't tell me about it.


Chicken Soup
1 whole Chicken, skin removed
Water
Salt and Pepper
1 Onion
4 Carrots, peeled and chopped
2 stalks Celery, chopped
10 medium Button Mushrooms, washed and sliced
2 cloves of Garlic, minced
2 California Bay Leaves
Noodles (1 1/2 cups, uncooked), Rice (1 cup, uncooked) or Potatoes (4, peel left on, washed and cut into 1/2 inch cubes)

Remove the giblets, and throw the chicken (with the neck) into a large stock pot. Add enough water to cover by 2 inches. Salt and pepper to taste (about 1/2 teaspoon each, maybe a little less pepper). Add the bay leaves. I like to keep the onion peel and carrot peel and put them into a cheesecloth satchel and add to the pot at this point. If you want to, it adds to a more complex broth.

Bring to a boil and reduce to a low simmer. Let it bubble for 2 hours. The gelatin from the bones begins to break down and the meat gets very tender. Remove the chicken (and the cheesecloth satchel) from the broth, but don't take it off the heat. Let the broth continue to simmer. Using forks, seperate the large pieces of meat from the bones. Let it cool enough to use your hands on the carcass.

Take as much meat off the bones as you can. Shred it or chop it. Put it back in the pot with the veggies. If you're using rice or potatoes, add them now. Let simmer for an hour. (If you're using noodles, add them about 20 minutes before you're ready to serve.)

Left overs are great.

Saint Valentine's Day Means Duck!

Duck is an exotic dish that, when prepared well, fills the senses with joy, but when prepared poorly, is a greasy, gamy disappointment. I've never made duck before, so what better day to try it than Valentine's Day?

First, the duck itself. 2 kinds: Muscovy (richer, fattier and a little gamy) and Pekin (milder, a little less fat). I went to the local King Soopers and got a 5.95 pound duck. I looked everywhere on the label and sure enough, it says "Duck," but that and "with Orange Glaze" were the only descriptors. On the back I found "Maple Leaf Farms" so I went to their website. No other description. OK, so I don't know what I'm making, but since King Soopers only carries on kind of duck, it doesn't matter. That's one factor I can't control.

(Note: I wrote Maple Leaf Farms and they were kind enough to answer: They only raise and produce White Pekins.)

THE hallmark of good duck is a crispy skin. And to get a good crisp, the skin has to be perfectly dry. I took the thawed duck out of its packaging at 1:00 pm and removed the giblets, clipped the wings, removed any excess fat and skin and rinsed it thoroughly (inside and out). I then patted it dry and seasoned it. I put it on a wire cooling rack but needed to elevate it to get good airflow all the way around the skin. And inside too, if possible. I don't have a vertical cooking rack for a chicken (or any other poultry, for that matter) so i made one out of chicken wire.

After a couple of hours, the skin was good and dry. Martha Stewart and others recommend scoring the skin and piercing it immediately. One recipe I saw recommended pouring boiling water over it, then piercing it. That seems dumb, because it completely defeats the dry-skin method of delicious crispiness! The Maple Leaf Farms website recommends cooking first for 20 minutes, then piercing or scoring the skin. That actually made good sense.

The cooking is pretty straight forward. Preheat oven and cook. Turn it, drain it, baste it, keep cooking.

But the sauce . . . . What to do for the sauce? I refuse to use prepackaged sauce. It may be delicious and the best thing I've ever tried, but I can NOT bring myself to use it when I'm such a megalomaniac about my own cooking. But Maple Leaf Farms got the theme right: Sweets and sours play well together. And some spices should really enhance the richness of duck. (See what I tried, below.)

Now, what about the appetizer? Sides? Dessert? How about stuffed baby portabella mushrooms, fingerling heirloom potatoes, parsnips and sweet potatoes oven-fried in duck fat, and roasted asparagus with bacon? And maybe baked custard with a little something extra?

All-in-all, it turned out very well. And a very messy kitchen. And a little smoke. Most things turned out well but I can always use more practise. You buy the duck and I'll cook it for you. At your house. In your kitchen.

Stuffed Baby Portabellas

6 Portabella Mushrooms, 3 inch caps
2 tablespoons Bacon Fat
1 tablespoon diced Onions
1 teaspoon diced Garlic
1 tablespoon crushed Gingersnaps
2 tablespoons grated Parmesan Cheese (or other dry white cheese)

Rinse and dry the mushrooms. (There is NO PROBLEM with giving mushrooms a quick rinse. If anyone ever tells you to never rinse mushrooms, have them do the science.) Remove the stems, and dice the stems only. Leave the caps whole.

Melt the fat in a skillet, medium heat. Add onion, garlic, gingersnap powder, and mushroom stems. Saute. Give it some love--it's Valentine's Day.

Spoon the mixture into the caps of the shrooms. Top with the cheese. Bake at 350 degrees for 15 minutes. Let stand for 10 minutes to cool and return the juices.


Cranberry Glaze with Balsamic Vinegar

3/4 cup reserved Cranberry Jelly with Cardamom
1/2 cup Sugar
1/4 cup Balsamic Vinegar (I use 12 year Elsa Balsamic)

A few weeks ago I made a basic cranberry sauce from whole cranberries. Basic recipe, but I added 7 or 8 Cardamom pods. With time the cranberries became so delicious that they disappeared, but I could not bring myself to discard the liquid. This became its last hurrah!

Put all ingredients into a pot on medium heat and stir until sugar is melted. reduce heat and let simmer until the sauce is reduced to 1/3 of original volume.

The sauce will also go great on ice cream!

Potato, Parsnips, Sweet Potatoes

6 each of Yukon, Red and Purple fingerling Potatoes
1 medium Ruby Sweet Potato, peeled
1 medium Parsnip, peeled
reserved Duck Fat

Chop all root veggies to about 1 inch diameter and 2-3 inches long. Put onto a microwave safe plate and microwave on high for 3-5 minutes. Place into a baking dish and season with salt and pepper. Ladle duck fat over everything. Put into 375 degree oven for 15 minutes. Stir and return to oven for another 10 minutes. Add salt and pepper, to taste.

Asparagus with Bacon

1 bunch of Asparagus
3 strips of Bacon, cooked until chewy, chopped

Remove the woody ends from the asparagus. Put the good parts on a lined baking sheet. Cover with bacon bits. Bake in a 375 degree oven for 15-20 minutes. Lightly season with salt and/or pepper.


Oven-roasted Duck

1 5-6 pound Duck

Kosher Salt

8 sprigs of Thyme

6 Allspice Berries, 10 Black Pepper Corns, 6 Whole Cloves, crushed

Remove the duck from its packaging, and take out the giblets and whatever other nonsense the producers stick inside the bird. Keep the neck and giblets, throw the rest away. (Unless you want to keep it. Free country, do what you want.) Clip the wing tips off. Remove any excess fat and skin, e.g., the tail, the fat around the belly, etc. Rinse the bird thoroughly under cold water and pat it dry with paper towels. (For health reasons, use paper towels. Something reusable can spread germs, so screw you environment. I need to be sustained, too.) Season inside and out with salt and spices. Let it dry completely for a couple of hours. (I actually took a hair drier to the crevasses of the skin that was still tacky to the touch.)

Preheat oven to 425 degrees. Stuff the thyme into the cavity, and tie the legs. Put the bird on a baking rack, breast-side up. Cook for 20 minutes. Remove the bird and using a sharp knife or very sharp fork, pierce the skin everywhere. Don't go all the way into the meat, but do get into the nooks and crannies around the thighs and legs. Turn it over and get the back, too. Put the bird back into the oven for 45 minutes, breast down. Then, using more paper towels, tilt the bird, draining the juices into the baking pan. Flip the duck breast-side up and cook for 30 - 45 minutes more, or until the thigh temperature reads 160 degrees.

Cover the back with your glazing of choice (Cranberry and Balsamic was AMAZING!) and cook for another 5 minutes. (Watch that it doesn't burn. Lots of sugar can over-caramelize in a hurry.)

Let stand, covered, for 10 minutes.

Slice and serve!

And just for my Sister-in-Law:

Baked Custard

8 Strawberries
1/2 cup Sugar
3 tablespoons Water

1 cup Milk
1 cup Half and Half
1 cup Sugar
4 Eggs, beaten
1/4 teaspoon Salt
1 teaspoon Vanilla Extract

Boiling Water

In a small saucepan, combine the strawberries, sugar and water. Heat until the sugar is melted and bubbly. Crush the berries--I use a potato masher. Keep cooking at a low temperature until thick. Set aside and let cool.

Preheat oven to 325 degrees. In a larger sauce pan, combine the milk, half and half, salt and sugar. Heat to a boil continuing to whisk the entire time. Temper the eggs. (That means to slowly add small amounts of the boiling milk to the eggs while whisking it together. Add a little more. You want to slowly bring the temperature of the eggs up, as a liquid until it nearly matches the milk. If done too quickly, your eggs are going to scramble.) Add the egg mixture to the milk mixture and whisk a little more. Remove from heat and add the vanilla. (You can also add other flavorings at this point. Citrus zest, chopped herbs, etc.)

Put a tablespoon or two of the strawberry mixture at the bottom of your custard cups. (Small, round-bottom coffee cups or ramekins also work well.) Ladle custard mixture in on top. In a deep baking dish, lay a kitchen towel, flat. Put the cups on top of the towel. Transfer the baking dish to the oven and gently pour the water into the baking dish, being careful not to splash into the custard. The water should come 1/2 way up the cups.

Bake for 35 minutes or until the custard has a loose jello consistency. Remove from the water bath and chill.

Serve in the cup.