A letter from Spain

Hello friends and relatives.

We have traveled to the foreign soils of the Iberian Peninsula, to the town of Barcelona, and in our initial foray, have beheld numerous sights leading to these shared observations.

First, the people of Europe look categorically malnourished by American standards, although there is hope. Whereas I've noticed the healthy girth of American waistlines and shorts that ride up as one walks down an American street, the same features are far less prevalent in our friends across The Pond. Many women, for example, have thighs which barely touch as they walk!  Blessedly, now and then, we can see the native German or Italian or sometimes even Spaniard with a shirt or pant-size of which to be truly proud, and this gives my heart encouragement. Still, the Dutch and Swedes are far too tall, winsome and thin to be fully equipped for general healthy living let alone their long winters.

Which leads me to my Second Important Point: I believe the food to be the cause of the generally lean nature of these inhabitants.  The cuisine here focuses on delicious cured meats, recently caught seafood, fine cheeses and fresh fruit and vegetables. Even the toast is spread with wholesome olive oil and a thin tomato juice--the natives literally rub a fresh, sliced, juicy tomato over the bread toasted in olive oil. Granted, there is wine plenty enough to spare, but with the wholesomeness of the cooking, one must consume vast quantities of both to maintain one's fortitude. Blessedly, the Catalonians are generous by their very nature.

Many in Spain walk the streets looking for such sustenance. The shops and restaurants are open late (10:00 pm to 12:00 am is standard for dining) and the sidewalks are wide to accommodate their numbers. Roads lace and interweave with these walkways and are filled with speeding taxi cabs and vehicles of the sporting wealthy class. You see, it appears to be a great entertainment for the walkers--possibly as a brief diversion from there plighted march to the next feeding station--to dodge among the vehicles zipping past. In their turn, the cars and motorbikes seem to speed up if their headlights catch the sight of human prey in their sweep. Although the odds seem to favor the automobile by the sheer numbers of pedestrians in the street, still we have not seen the fallen footman taken by their determined nemesis. This dodging and darting seems to be frivolous sport, burning precious calories.

There exists, along this treacherous migration, some respite. When the enthusiasm for the sport has waned, we've witnessed small packs of participants reclining on any of the numerous benches provided by the city founders. If benches are too distant, these same weary sojourners will squat in nearly any doorway, alley or parking garage. The poor, confused waifs, in an attempt to satiate their ever-present hunger (owing to their being so thin), have taken to putting all nature of things in their mouths, most commonly, lit cigarettes. Sadly, cigarettes depress appetite but do nothing for adding needed pounds. 

Perhaps the cigarettes are aging their population.  Observe: throughout your day, in Europe or even back home, you will witness the grizzled and weathered faces of elderly men or women holding cigarettes between their knotted fingers.  However, you will never see the same haggard, wrinkled visage on the obese.  I firmly believe that our extreme calorie count preserves our youth--right up to the day we die.

We depart this fascinating city, half a world away from you all, in the morning. I will send more news as events warrant.

Humbly yours,
--M

If you feel the need to try something tasty and not very fattening, try:

Catalan Tomato Toasts

2-3 slices of Bread per person
Olive Oil
1-2 ripe Tomatoes per person (the big round ones, not Roma or Plum tomatoes--those are too dry)
pinch of coarse Salt and cracked Pepper, if desired

Heat 2 tablespoons of olive oil in a flat bottomed skillet on medium to medium high heat.  Lay the bread in to fry, 2-3 minutes or until they're cooked the way you like them.  Turn over and toast the other side in the remaining oil (if there is any) for 1-2 minutes.  Remove the toast to a warm plate.  Repeat with the rest of the bread.

Cut the tomatoes in half. While the toast is hot, rub the cut side of the tomato into the toast, letting the bread absorb the juice and seeds and pulp.  Use a half of a tomato for every 1-2 pieces of toast. 

Sprinkle with a little salt and pepper if you like that sort of thing.  I do.

Serve by itself or on a platter with meats, cheeses and dried fruits.



Satire noun (\ˈsa-ˌtī(-ə)r\)

1: a literary work holding up human vices and follies to ridicule or scorn

2: trenchant wit, irony, or sarcasm used to expose and discredit vice or folly